The day I don't say a word to you anymore is the day I truly give up.
So dont, please.

I don't know what to do with you anymore!

*cries out loud*

I have a feeling that in the end, I'm the one that is running away from everything.

Good things come together?

Well, at least that's what chyichyi says.

Perhaps, in this case... When they come together, it doesn't become a good thing?

I don't know man... Spoilt with choices aint really a good thing at times?

:s Plus when it comes to this matter, it's not about choices...right?

Oh gosh... Jinni... What have you stepped into or stepping into?

Meanwhile, a lil stressed out about HIC.. Cant seem to get any good ideas. Arhhhhh

Confused. Might as well numb myself.

I dont know which one should I talk to. And always trying to talk myself out of it.
But figured it's better to just numb myself and not think about it.
In the end, I just talk to neither of them.

Although I know numbing myself is probably just a temporary solution.
可是，我就只有这样才可以让我一天过一天。

The Legend (in 40 minutes)

So I was on the way back to KL for CNY last Friday (20th Jan)
and I happened to watch this documentary on the bus.
I find it inspirational.

I hope it's the same for you. ;)

Well, initially I thought of just posting the part 3 and part 4. But I figured you'll get the drift better watching right from beginning.

There are so many things I can quote from this short documentary.

"With all we think we know about Michael Jackson, it's easy to forget what the fuss was about in the first place." 

- The Michael Jackson Story (Part 1)

Sold the highest record on number of albums, won 8 grammy awards in just one night (unbeatable record thus far),

AND THE LIST GOES ON!

When I was watching the whole documentary.. I realised how big a fuss he was and what he done was really legend-(wait for it)-ary. In the business terminology, he is simply the founder of pop music and he created a brand which people go gaga about.

I couldn't help but wonder to myself, WHAT HAPPENED... He was once so high-and-mighty!

But tonight, I know why..


Sometimes when you're too good for so long, people forget you're doing great things. People take it for granted. And slowly, every little bad (in terms of expectations from certain people) or perhaps not-so-bad-at-all performance just doesn't seem that good anymore.

Even if it is good, it felt like it does not matter to them anymore BECAUSE

all of these becomes necessary and expected but not appreciated.

And that's when you strive so hard to live up to their expectation and start to lose yourself.
Every time  you start thinking of how to outdo yourself, make it better each time,

you forgot that it was IN YOU... What's inside of you was the reason you SHONE in the very first place.

So yah.. I guess that was what went wrong. YES, stop trying to take every piece of me away!!!
Because I'll never be good enough for you!

"OMG, look at who he has become.. As time went on, it became more and more important for him to be more spectacular and more gimmicky. For me, the best of Michael..was before he was responding to the pressure to be Michael." 

- Suzanne de Passe

Happy (belated) birthday Dai Lou!

In the best of mood although somewhere in my mind or heart, feeling a lil sucky...

Like more work piling up. NOT GOOD.

Saving money and earning money. NOT EASY.

Nothing comes easy I guess..

God bless me on achieving dreams and goals! Give me strength to hold on! *BITES  HARD*

gosh, wondering where am i getting to with this post...


Let's just end this at.. "Don't be sad about what you didn't receive but instead, give what you wana get
to other people because you know EXACTLY how it feels like to not have it."
<3
Night!

So why did Jinni find life interesting today (I mean yesterday, since it's past 12am)

 So the visit to the innovation lab where the students build solar car, diesel car and electric car HYPED ME UP QUITE A BIT.

I AM SO EXCITED! It felt like, okay learning is going to get real! :D
Yeaaa, I'm planning to take part in the electric vehicle project. And then I'll know how's it like to build a vehicle from scratch. (One step closer to my dreams!)
And then continue to do sth of that sort for my Final Year Project (FYP)!!
Wheeeeeee. Now we're talking! ;)

Warning, the following content is RARE in jinni's blog... PHOTOS! (omg right? :p)

 So the above photo is the solar car that got NTU into 12th place out of close to 80 competitors from all over the world in the shell eco-marathon challenge!

Yup so that's number 1. Then number 2 would be... I AM OFFICIALLY BIZ MAG SUBCOMM TODAY ONWARDS :p (That means a lil more work)

Thirdly! I applied for a part time job - phonathon. If i get shortlisted for interview, then i'll be working!
Need to earn buckets of money for Europe trip! In fact, i was also considering giving tuitionnnn. Better money... It's like 1 hour tuition is slightly more pay than 3 hours of phonathon!

Then last but not least! Henkel Innovation Challengeeeee! Cant believe we got through to the next round! omg!

ok.. getting reallyyyyy sleepy. NIGHT!

So much for a start.

Well, I was very excited to start school at first.

But after all that happened just in one morning/midnight...
Basically, at about 12 or 12.30am, i went to the toilet, cos it was rather urgent, I just took my usual black leather pouch with all my keys inside and some other stuff. But i left it hanging at the cubicle's door. Cos we only needed to tap in to go to the toilet but dont need to tap out. So i forgotten about it.

Next morning, i couldnt find it anywhere.
In the evening, I went knocking from door to door.

- One girl said she knocked at my door at 1+am but nobody answered, so she hung it on the door. (which i thought i was just about to sleep.. but i didnt hear her knocking! which i feel DAMN PEK CHEK ABOUT, how could she just leave it at the door... she said she didnt think anyone will take it.)

- (Just checked with the cleaner)
Cleaner said she didnt see anything hanging at the door when she came in about 7+am yesterday.
(so my last hope is kinda crashed :( sobs sobs sobs)

Yesterday, I went to the hall office thrice! First time to report (~9.15am), 2nd time to check (~5pm), 3rd time after the girl told me she left it hanging at the door (~5.30pm)! Then they told me if I don't void the hall key then he/she will be able to access to my room at anytime at all. But if I do void it, i'll have to pay SGD$50!!!! THAT'S A LOT TO ME.
And even if I found my pouch and stuff back after that, that is not refundable!
:S :( waddya want me to do...

I AM STILL HOPING THAT IT WILL MIRACULOUSLY POP OUT IN FRONT OF MY ROOM
OR THE HALL OFFICE WILL CALL AND INFORM ME THAT SOMEBODY PASS STH LOST AND FOUND TO THEM,
THE BLACK LEATHER POUCH,
with everything still inside.

i'd still like to believe there's some nice ppl around because :'( i dont have courage to tell my parents about it yet. and i want my msia sim card, keys and ocbc token back...

i cant believe this happened. and it's still troubling me now.

"It's weird, it doesn't hurt quite as much." (But it still bugs me.)

Last 4 years, I got stronger each time. And in this 2 years, I'll get a little bit stronger each day.
Till we meet again.

Lesser people in KL

and one less reason to come back to KL.

New Year! Happy everyone!

I think with everything happening to everyone around me and happening to myself...

It feels like a movie..
I can shoot my very own version of "New Year's Eve", I tell ya!