Should I reconsider my choice.

I feel like running away from this.. whole rship thingy..

I think I get so paranoid. I get weak.. I don't like it..

As much as I am tough on the outside, how guys think I'm insensitive and all that.. I've got a fragile heart.

That's why I enveloped my heart with many layers of protective mechanism.. Once you removed those layers, I am nothing but a fragile heart.

And it's this kinda of time that I feel so helpless. I need so much of sense of security..

****Updates****

I feel better with a clearer mind now after talking to suga poppa..
but i dont know what to say to Will now.. Hmmm..
Maybe just leave it as it is first..?

WJB

I need you to know that I appreciate all these gestures.

With guilt, I realised how I've been telling you I want this, I want that, I live by my rules..

I thought that was just ME trying my best to be myself and not let you change me.

But what I didn't realise was that I am subconsciously comparing you to this set of standards I previously had and I REALLY shouldn't do that..

I'm opening up the doors.

", ily

You can do it jinnigannn.

I just know.

P.S. you just need to be more focus and less distracted. Sort it out. You'll get there ;)

Peace and Quiet.

It feels so good, sitting alone at the dining area by the sliding door,

just enjoying the breeze and eating some microwaved-leftover-food from dinner last night

while listening to the radio.

SO heavenly, at least for now and this few hours.
It's been such a long time since I was home alone, here in Tanah Merah at least.

I knocked out right away after sending Vincent off to the airport just now.. for about 2 hours?
Am sick.. Cough and all that..

But waking up finding peace and quiet at home, all by myself.. feels strangely incredible..
Kinda reminds me how I didn't like this feeling when I was in my 1st and 2nd year of my Uni years,

but learning to appreciate a bit of this?

Don't get me wrong, it's not that I want to live alone or complaining that I'm tired (which I am..),

it's just that I needed space and time alone.. after so long.

So good to have time for myself.. :) So much to do. Better get going.


I'm finally breathing.. :)