Sunday, November 16, 2008

heaven take my hand please...

i just need to express myself right now.
it's 5.20am in the morning. I'm not sleeping yet.
and in a while more, my family will be leaving to singapore.
I'll be home alone again.
That feeling sucks.
and that kevin leaves my life,
that sucks too. utterly.
I miss him a lot. I really do.
But who am I suppose to tell all these to?
I wonder how is he doing right now...
Is he coping well? Is he devastated?
Trying to forget about me?
I thought I'd be okay. Truth is, I'm not.
But I dont want to show it to anyone.
and so I resort to crying myself to sleep everynight.
I still have 3 more papers and I'm done, but I have no mood at all to study for the rest of my exams already.
I really really need a break.
I just wana go somewhere far away. I want to go to UK or US for my degree.
Expand my social network and broaden my horizon.
But I will miss my family and friends here. Of course, kevin too.
It's till lately that I found out, how much I love my family, daddy mommy especially, and my close friends. True ones. Of course that includes chyi. It's been quite hard for me to talk to tasha. Because she's always preoccupied or she'd go offline suddenly.

Rica called me. I'm glad I talked to her. I miss all my high school true friends. Of course, I'm glad to have all my classmates right now. I love them too.

This is my first post here. I wished it's filled with sth jolly. But I guess this blog will be just for me to read. Or more like for me to write and forget?

Voices in my heart:
I wish I can look into your eyes and just tell you how much I miss you right now. (As tears roll down)

I'm going to flood the whole room. Lol.

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